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#1 mantawolf

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Posted 06 October 2011 - 07:10 AM

Chuck Norris died years ago, Death is just afraid to come get him.
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#2 agentorange197

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Posted 12 October 2011 - 07:38 AM

Sorry Can't help myself:Chuck Norris was once bitten by a rattlesnake while hiking. After six hours of excruciating pain, the rattlesnake died.
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#3 Kenny

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Posted 12 October 2011 - 09:23 AM

Little kids check under their beds for monsters. Monsters check under their beds for Chuck Norris.
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#4 Rob Henderson

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Posted 12 October 2011 - 10:34 AM

Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups, he pushes the Earth down...
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#5 mantawolf

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Posted 12 October 2011 - 02:57 PM

HA!  I knew this was the kind of place this would catch eventually!!! Chuck Norris is so fast he can run around the world and hit himself in the back of the head.

#6 Kenny

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Posted 13 October 2011 - 01:50 AM

(Another version of the one I posted previously) Little kids wear Superman pajamas but Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
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#7 agentorange197

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Posted 15 October 2011 - 04:57 AM

Chuck Norris once killed 142 Columbian drug lords using a single magazine. He then proceeded to sit down and read it as police arrived.
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#8 Fedup

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Posted 29 October 2011 - 01:20 AM

Chuck Norris blow bubbles with beef jerky.

#9 Kenny

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Posted 29 October 2011 - 04:02 AM

Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares. 
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#10 IdahoMike

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Posted 13 January 2012 - 06:13 PM

...has a hidden third fist underneath his beard.
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#11 Kenny

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Posted 02 March 2012 - 08:19 AM

Chuck Norris was born May 6th, 1945. Nazi Germany surrendered May 7th, 1945. Coincidence...?
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#12 charles forbes

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Posted 24 June 2012 - 11:30 PM

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#13 Kenny

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Posted 25 June 2012 - 02:05 AM

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - TWICE.
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#14 TearsOfNorris

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Posted 11 July 2012 - 01:35 AM

Lex Luther tried to hang a weight by a strand of Chuck Norris' hair, but the weights kept catching on fire

#15 blackredux

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Posted 20 November 2012 - 03:13 AM

There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

#16 blackredux

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Posted 20 November 2012 - 03:38 AM

Chuck Norris tried to join the Marines, but the UN prohibits the use of weapon of mass destruction

#17 Slipery4life

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 11:02 AM

Chuck Norris doesnt swim water just wants to be around him and when he is in the ocean he can smell sharks blood.

#18 SKD_Tactical

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 11:09 AM

Not sure if this one crosses the line :

Chuck Norris once masturbated in a semi truck. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

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#19 Slipery4life

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 12:28 PM

hahahah that optimus prime is a good one hahahahah if they make another Transformers movie they need to have chuck norris in it that would be epic

#20 Kenny

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Posted 27 November 2012 - 02:48 PM

Chuck Norris doesn't use the Force, Chuck Norris IS the Force.
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